I’ve been so bad the past couple of days, and for that I’m so sorry – you’re only really getting half a post today as well.
I’m pretty tired, mentally and physically. Monday was a lot worse than I thought it would be and the world I think was conspiring to break me.
So I took Tuesday off and wrapped myself in a burrito blanket and ignored the rest of the world.
It helped, a little. I’m in the process of getting in to see a counsellor through my work’s Employee Assistance Program which will help the feelings of despair, guilt, anger etc that I’m feeling.
I think I was so focused on getting through things. Christmas. The tattoo. New Year. The Funeral. The birthday. That I didn’t think about myself very much and now that I have time, I’m a bit more crumbly around the edges than I thought.
There are many kinds of strength, however. This, being able to admit that you’re falling apart at the seams and that you need to spend some time to stitch yourself back together? That’s strength of a kind.
So, short post tonight. But I’ll give you another chapter of the Air Book as I’ve been calling it probably tomorrow with Marcus and Alana and Sam and Kai and all that sort of good stuff. If you want to see more of them, let me know please! It was an idea I had, I spent a lot of time fleshing it out and really, I like the idea of Elementals (but only if I get to be the Water Elemental, hah!).
Much love and light y’all! ❤